Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Habemus Corsarium

I am all of these names. I am none of them. I am a multifaceted gem sparkling a thousand dreams, a thousand nightmares. I am your buddy, your adversary, your comedy, your tragedy, your prose, your poetry, your life, your death, your unlife.

I am Phillip Yerro Kimpo Jr. A typical complete birth certificate name -- a first name, a mother's maiden name, a surname. And a Jr. to mark me as a successor to some throne, a nominal rip-off even. To my utmost joy, there is no second name attached to Phillip, the ones generously given by the queer parents of my generation. Luckily I didn’t end up as Phillip Alexander (which would’ve been bad, considering I want my son to be Alexander the Great and me Phillip of the Philippines), or Phillip Paul (which would’ve been bad, because that’d mean I was just another Christian name-clone, and of course, Phillip Paul simply sounds awful), or even (heaven forbid) Phillip Giovanni. Without a second name, this chap’s truly inimitable in his generation -- Phillip Jr. Wait, does Jr. count as a second name? Damn.

I am Philos Stormblade. The hero of my swords-and-sorcery fantasy saga. You’re thinking, what an insipid name. But isn’t that the case with your name? Or mine for that matter. Philos means love; Phillip means lover of horses. Stormblade is a pedestrian high-fantasy surname denoting a, yes, blade of the storms; Kimpo is supposedly Korean for port of gold. What’s the diff? Absolutely none. It’s not in the meaning of the name; it’s in how you put meaning into it. It’s not about carrying the name; it’s about living it.

I am Phillip Kimpo Jr. A name without a middle name. There's no reason to put it there, for she is not here. Give explicit credit where credit is due, and implicit discredit where discredit is due.

I am Kidlat Karimlan. The Dark Lightning. The hero of my Tagalog short story for social change. The title is a paradox, lightning is chaos. Enough said.

I am Phillip Kimpo II. The II makes me an Emperor. Didn’t you know? Philip of Macedon was Philip II. Told you, my son is going to be Alexander the Great. And do you actually think Emperor Phillip Jr. is going to strike fear into the hearts of my foes? Jr. is for the boys. I am a man.

I am P.Y. Kimpo. A dreadful, uncalled-for imitation of T.S. Eliot. Makes me feel like a famous writer already. And yes, it is a nifty shortcut. Downside? My mother’s partaking of the fame.

I am Kimpo. To my friends, there’s no Phillip; there’s only Kimpo. Good morning, Kimpo! O Kimpo, kamusta na? Bwiset ‘tong si Kimpo e! It’s alright; after all, I am my family. I am the Clan within the Man. Kimpo -- Korean or Filipino, it matters not. I am a nation of my own.

I am the Corsarius. Simply, a corsair. Captain of my own ship, terror of Life’s seedy ports. Tavern of preference -- The Crimson Pen. Barmaid of preference -- any of the Greek Muses. Molded by twenty years of pain and hardship, and prone to moments of deep angst. I do throw tantrums, but tantrums of the pen. I am a corsair, not a pirate. I am a swashbuckler, not a buccaneer. I express my angst with panache and wit, not with demented aggression. With the pen as my cutlass, I will set sail and claim the seven seas as my own.

I am PYKJ. I am Phil the Insipid-titled. I am the Junior. I am Light Darkning. I am the Second. I am P.Y. Eliot. I am Kimps. I am Cors. I am all of these names. I am none of them.

I am who I am. I am who I! I am who? I am.

I.

14 Comments:

Blogger ia said...

Aye.

Rise forth, Corsarius.

*gross breathing under an evil black shiny mask*

Er, not you.

You.

At points I didn't expect certain tones or lines of this piece to come out like that, given the title. But then, somehow, I understand. Somehow, with all the lightning and thunder and night and cold that aptly cloak the wonderfully imposing latin, followed by a thousand other daunting shards of you, it was fun to read, too. ^_^

It's nice to have blog where you can be all you, ne?

(Swashbuckly. That's for the bishies only.)

Ito dapat sabihin ni Kai sa 'yo on this post: hindi lang schizophrenia kundi multiple personality ang disorder mo!

(You forgot something, Rainier, Prince of Monaco. *rolls over and chokes to death* Kimpuu! At sori ha, Kimpo rolls off the tongue a lot better most of the time.)

11:11 PM  
Blogger Corsarius said...

thanks, ia-chan. :) i'm glad you found it entertaining, wehe. and yes. it's nice to be just me in this blog. no pretentions whatsoever that accompany some of my 'forced' writings.

multiple personality? dati ko pa alam yan! :D joke. no, i'm only one person -- The Corsarius.

Rainier pala ha. Grr. Hehe.

2:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like Corsarius best.

It's so you.

But wait, who are you again?

Basta.

Corsarius. I like that.

7:31 AM  
Blogger Corsarius said...

me too. I like Corsarius best. why? you hit right on the head -- it's so me.

and of course, it's way cooler than being called Kimpo :D

2:56 PM  
Blogger {illyria} said...

you are so refreshingly dramatic. and i like corsarius, too. fits you and the different facets of your personality i've come to know through your blog. and btw, a corsair by any other name will still write badass posts.

11:42 PM  
Blogger claudzki said...

for some reason, i like philos stormblade...

it's probably because when i search/choose a fantasy name, mine gives no positive meaning :D

1:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What about Kimpee? And Buhawi Jack? :P

Ako, I like... Kimpipop best! :P

9:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ako din! people call me by so many names that i can't remember them all.. but unlike you, only of those names reflects the real me :)

- light-

1:02 AM  
Blogger juned said...

How about the Phillip the Younger or Corsarius the Hammer :)

8:17 AM  
Blogger Abster said...

My Dad's a Jr. too. But sa kanya, the case is, since he has a chinese name which is rather hard to pronounce, people call him JUNIOR or JUN as if this is his real name.

Hehe! So I guess the Jr. served him a great purpose.

1:06 PM  
Blogger Corsarius said...

to transience: thanks. still angsty methinks, but the important thing is you found it refreshing.

when i started blogging, my silly little dream was to be the number one Corsarius on Google, hehe. and i'm very happy to have attained that goal :D as if that keyword is prime property.

badass posts. i like it. :) and i still remember the asshat thing, hehe.

2:50 PM  
Blogger Corsarius said...

to claudzki: wow. and i thought it was an insipid name. ;) now my mind will be at peace -- when I 'release' the novel, at least one person will not laugh at Philos Stormblade, hehe.

to kai: Kimpee? Pimpo na lang (c/o Jeric). hah. pero siempre cute din ang Kimpipop. si Lee dati, Kimpop ang tawag sa kin. sikat kasi yung 'Pop' ng N'Sync noon. :p

4:13 PM  
Blogger Corsarius said...

to light: hehe. i haven't even included my nicknames here. and yes, i can't remember them all! ;) hey, thank you so much for the cbox comment: i love this one thing you said: "junior is for boys, while i am a man." it's so true! II sounds more classy. appreciate it. :)

to juned: aye, Phillip the Younger would be fine, too. :) btw, why "the Hammer"? can't quite figure it out, hehe.

4:48 PM  
Blogger Corsarius said...

to abster: haha. truly, it did. :) almost all of the people I know who are 'Juniors' are called by the names Jun, Jun-jun, Juny, and so forth. i'm quite fortunate to have been called "Phlip-phlip" when I was a child. it's uniquely flippy. ;)

thanks for the tag on the cbox: I loved the latest entry...galing ng angles. :D i didn't actually plan for it to be so, let's just say, 'multifaceted'. it just turned out to be. ngarag na kasi utak ko noon, hehe! kaya chaotic din ang dating.

newei, salamat po uli :)

9:51 PM  

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