Sketch
For vanity's sake, here's a short vignette about this blogger. It's a bit angsty, a bit silly, and a whole lot messy and disorganized. I'd be the first one to label it as non-sense rambling rather than as a true person's snapshot. But hey, my whole existence has been based on chaos, and so it reflects on the writing. Here goes:
I’m slim as a whole, yet my tummy bulges. I can’t sing a tune, I can’t dance a jig. I’m an aspiring yet unfortunately humdrum writer, a poet who dreams he is one. I love basketball, yet when I play my lungs give out every thirty minutes. I still can’t drive our second-hand Mitsubishi Lancer. I dream of winning a Palanca, but in all probability they’ll just burn my submission because of its revolting mediocrity. I do weights, but no more than twenty pounds per arm. I puff my Ventolin inhaler at least once a day. I desperately want to be published, but they don’t accept shit like this. My Chicago Bulls are cellar-dwellers, and Jordan’s gone for eternity. Every morning when I wake up, I suffer from a mild bout of asthma. I have an eye (and more) for beautiful women, but have never made love to any of them. My finicky computer tortures me as I type this vignette. Two years since graduating, I still haven’t received my high school diploma. I courted a girl for three years, but she busted me on Araw ng Kagitingan*. Last night the Purefoods TJ Hotdogs lost by thirty to Ginebra. I worked my ass off to be a Dean’s Lister this semester, while my effortless UP varsity friend is a consistent President’s Lister. Every time I call my girl best-friend, we end up fighting for an hour or two. My siblings are four dogs, and the Dalmatian growls every time I pat his head. My only literary piece about my beloved Fire Tree got massacred in a writing workshop. I have no mother, she said she loves me but I think abandoning your son is not and will never be motherly love. Tomorrow, the Philippine’s National Election Day, I’ll be celebrating my birthday.
*in English, Day of Heroism
[Originally written
I’m slim as a whole, yet my tummy bulges. I can’t sing a tune, I can’t dance a jig. I’m an aspiring yet unfortunately humdrum writer, a poet who dreams he is one. I love basketball, yet when I play my lungs give out every thirty minutes. I still can’t drive our second-hand Mitsubishi Lancer. I dream of winning a Palanca, but in all probability they’ll just burn my submission because of its revolting mediocrity. I do weights, but no more than twenty pounds per arm. I puff my Ventolin inhaler at least once a day. I desperately want to be published, but they don’t accept shit like this. My Chicago Bulls are cellar-dwellers, and Jordan’s gone for eternity. Every morning when I wake up, I suffer from a mild bout of asthma. I have an eye (and more) for beautiful women, but have never made love to any of them. My finicky computer tortures me as I type this vignette. Two years since graduating, I still haven’t received my high school diploma. I courted a girl for three years, but she busted me on Araw ng Kagitingan*. Last night the Purefoods TJ Hotdogs lost by thirty to Ginebra. I worked my ass off to be a Dean’s Lister this semester, while my effortless UP varsity friend is a consistent President’s Lister. Every time I call my girl best-friend, we end up fighting for an hour or two. My siblings are four dogs, and the Dalmatian growls every time I pat his head. My only literary piece about my beloved Fire Tree got massacred in a writing workshop. I have no mother, she said she loves me but I think abandoning your son is not and will never be motherly love. Tomorrow, the Philippine’s National Election Day, I’ll be celebrating my birthday.
*in English, Day of Heroism
[Originally written
slipped from the pen of Corsarius at 3:19 AM
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5 Comments:
ayan asa links ka na ng parser site. :P
with each passing day that bulge is getting a tad bigger. diet please! =p
tweets, if u found it amusing, then that's good news for me: out of chaos comes something silly and entertaining haha.
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[me taypo me]
--->I’m slim as a whole, yet my tummy bulges.
Mejo in proportion pa rin naman
--->I can’t sing a tune, I can’t dance a jig.
Don't think so. You can't sing more than one song. Pero mas astig yung nasa blogger profile mo (dati?) about singing in the bathroom
--->I’m an aspiring yet unfortunately humdrum writer, a poet who dreams he is one.
You are one, the One.
--->I love basketball, yet when I play my lungs give out every thirty minutes.
Kung pro league, that would be at least two quarters (kung babad)
--->I still can’t drive our second-hand Mitsubishi Lancer.
Got license? Meron di ba.
--->I dream of winning a Palanca, but in all probability they’ll just burn my submission because of its revolting mediocrity.
Nakikita ko na...
--->I do weights, but no more than twenty pounds per arm.
Try limbs =p
---> I puff my Ventolin inhaler at least once a day.
Puff the magic dragon... Naalala ko ito. Promise. Suntech!
--->I desperately want to be published, but they don’t accept shit like this.
not this one of course, but they accept "the other" "these".
--->My Chicago Bulls are cellar-dwellers, and Jordan’s gone for eternity.
NBA.Negotiations Behind the Association?--->Every morning when I wake up, I suffer from a mild bout of asthma.
Meron pa di ba? (a boy thing)
--->I have an eye (and more) for beautiful women, but have never made love to any of them.
Dalawang version.
Lovestruck Jonas: Ganyan talaga love. Ganyan talaga babae.
Sexually-Preoccupied Jonas: (on made love) Virgin?
o_0 <-- Jonas rin.
--->My finicky computer tortures me as I type this vignette.
Walang tatalo sa computer ko.
--->Two years since graduating, I still haven’t received my high school diploma.
Kelan ko lang din nakuha yung akin.
--->I courted a girl for three years, but she busted me on Araw ng Kagitingan*.
Araw ng Kagitingan is the Fall of Bataan.
"Coincindentally falling!"
--->Last night the Purefoods TJ Hotdogs lost by thirty to Ginebra.
TJ Hotdogs, nilasing ng Ginebra... [tabloid sports banner]
--->I worked my ass off to be a Dean’s Lister this semester, while my effortless UP varsity friend is a consistent President’s Lister.
Someone told me you can't have it all.--->Every time I call my girl best-friend, we end up fighting for an hour or two.
Silence.
--->My siblings are four dogs, and the Dalmatian growls every time I pat his head.
How cute!
--->My only literary piece about my beloved Fire Tree got massacred in a writing workshop.
Tungkol saan yun?
--->I have no mother, she said she loves me but I think abandoning your son is not and will never be motherly love.
um, me artik ako jan
--->Tomorrow, the Philippine’s National Election Day, I’ll be celebrating my birthday.
Then happy birthday. Beh =p
--->[Originally written on May 9, 2004]
After eight months then...
aha. here's what the great Transience thought of this post (on the tagboard): "btw, LOVED the blogger sketch. i thought you were interesting, but well...damn...you're so much better. LOL"
LOL! ^_^ thank you so much, transience.
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